turning all against the one is an art that's hard to teach

every time I have quiet serene moments to myself and I think of death and what I want in life, I seem to always have this burst of motivation to do anything possible to achieve what I want. Sadly, when I wake up the next morning, groggy and pissed that sunlight is staking my eyes into the back of my skull, I will always seem to forget or lose the motivation I had the day/night before and usually end up wasting the next few days doing nothing constructive.

How I wish I had the mental strength to do every single thing I said/hoped/want/need to do.


on the side note,i also wish certain people had more Y chromosomes in them so that they wouldnt be so motherfucking critical over what is completely unimportant and be more focused on the big picture.

ive been putting off several posts because i feel that i have so much to say but yet i have no idea how to say it and whenever i think about how i should construct the post, i digress or make things even worse. with that said, i also have no idea how to end off this post because thoughts are rapidly zipping around in my head like the windows text screen saver(you know, the one where you can set a sentence like 'blow me' and it bounces around the screen) except that in my case they are WOTs and are constantly changing every second and are bouncing/zipping around like a drunk, heavily caffeinated, sonic the hedgehog wearing turbo boots on steriods.